"You'll Miss This"... My Favorite Thing To Hear As A Mom

Thursday, July 25, 2019

You meet up with a group of moms at the playground for a playdate, coffee in hand.
Your hair is up in a messy bun, because who cares?
Your clothes may be a little disheveled.
Your child might not even have their shoes on.
Did you brush that one's hair? Who knows... you got here.

Three side by side photos of two blonde/brown haired curly haired toddler girls in matching Batgirl dresses

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You're asked how you're doing. This is probably the first adult conversation you've had all day, and you've been up for 7 hours... You respond with how your day has been and, quite frankly, it's been a really crappy day of your child/ren screaming, hitting, throwing their food, and not listening to a single thing you have to say. You're exhausted and overwhelmed, it shows, and you're absolutely complaining about it, because... Why not?

One of the mom's responds with "Oh, but you'll miss this...."

And you think to yourself.. "...I didn't say I hate them.."

Side by side photos of a toddler girl with curly hair sad and throwing a tantrum with her arms crossed
You see, as moms, our FAVORITE thing to hear, when we are exhausted, overwhelmed, and fed up, is how we're going to miss these days. Because, somehow, when we are expressing any feeling or thought, besides utter appreciation for their existence, we must conveying that we don't want our children... Right? Is that what you think we're saying?

Guys, I love my kids. I love them so much, it pains me. The thought of them not existing in my world is genuinely terrifying and painful. As they get older, it saddens me to watch them grow out of special little things. It bummed me out when my kids weaned. It makes me tear up when I realize how "grown up" my 11 year old is. There are so many things I'm going to miss about their childhoods, individually! That is true...

But, as they grow and go through certain stages, there are absolutely things I will not miss.

-Like screaming. The screaming, I will not miss. Ever. Hate it now and years down the road, when I look back, I'll remember that I hated it.

-Tantrums. Those can stop right now.

-Refusal of foods that I KNOW you like! I will not miss this. Eat your freaking food.

-Following me everywhere I go. I want my privacy. I want bathroom time. Heck, I wanna turn around without tripping over a small person!! Yeah, I won't miss that.

-Being asked no less than 500 questions a day, about stupid little crap. I get it, they're growing and curious and are SO smart! But for pete's sake, pull up Google and leave me alone for 5 minutes.

-Constantly asking me to buy them things. I said no. I meant no. And the 37th time you ask, I will still say no (but probably not as nice). Yep... Won't miss that.
A toddler in an orange floral dress, laying on the floor during a tantrum

You see, parenthood comes with a lot of ups and downs. There incredible aspects to it and the less incredible ones. The fact is, that kids are naturally annoying. We love them-- but they're annoying. They're supposed to be. They are growing and learning how to be functional adults and we are here to help them get there! But, in the mean time, they have behaviors that you are just not going to miss.

That's ok.

We are human. They are human. We do things that they don't like, and vice versa. Everyone does things that annoy each oher!

The difference is, no one tells you how much you're going to miss these days with your boss, whenever they tick you off. It is only with your children!

Red headed mother in a grey sweater hugging her curly blonde daughter

I am all for cherishing moments and opportunities and people! But please, when a mother is at the end of her rope, do not tell her how she's going to miss that feeling. She won't. It's dismissive. It's hurtful. It makes her feel bad. And it's ridiculous.... Because there is not one person, ever, who can sit back and think "Man, I really miss when my kids had explosive diarrhea on me..."


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